Just saying someone's name can cause us to react with such emotion, judgment, and certainty.
When we get emotional, we can't think clearly or be present in the conversation because now it becomes "All about us."
And these emotions can cause indigestion, anxiety, or fear. As a result, our body has to fight to regulate our internal state.
Most people would say the answer is just to say:
"Stop taking things so personally."
This is like telling a crying baby to "stop crying." It doesn't work.
Two Ways to Deal With Energy Draining Emotion
1. Are we aware what triggers us to get so emotional? (politics, a family member, work colleague, etc.)
Do we blame others, provide an excuse, or take ownership of our emotions?
"You make me so mad." (blame others)
"You know I'm passionate about _____ "(provide an excuse)
"How do I lose control that easy?" (take ownership)
2. Are we aware how our emotions occur to others?
When we get so emotional, do others around us clam up?
People that tend to get emotional tend to be so certain about the uncertain.
If we all do a better job at managing our emotions, we will have more meaningful conversations that will leave us feeling more powerful.
by Eric Papp